Even with a boisterous bunch of kids, tons of activities and
a busy social life, there is a surprising amount of marriages that are made of
two, very lonely people.
“I want to talk to him, but I know that he resents my
questions. He’ll just keep staring
at his computer as if I hadn’t said a thing, so why bother trying?”
“She has no idea how frustrating work is, but there she goes
complaining about how we haven’t taken a vacation in ages. Now why would I want
to spend a vacation listening to that irritating voice 24/7?”
The walls go up and the busy routines get busier, just to
drown out the emotional stalemate between the two. Does this sound familiar?
Ask yourself:
Was there ever a time we loved talking to each other? When did that end, or did it just fade
away? What happened? Do I really want to spend the rest of
my life in a lonely marriage? You
don’t have to if you don’t want to.
Unfortunately some couples never started out as
friends. Some found a partner that
was a convenient escape from a difficult life, others found an object of sexual
desire, and others just an opportunity to merge financial assets to raise a
family. Whatever the initial
motive for your marriage, it’s not too late to change course. But there is no way around the fact
that making your relationship successful now, requires turning what you have
into a friendship. And not any old
friendship, but a great friendship.
Great friendships talk.
Friends worry about each other’s feelings, and care about
what each other is going through.
They learn to read each other and believe the best in each other, can’t wait
to hang out, and think of each other first whenever there’s news to be shared.
Friends enjoy a good laugh, and don’t take themselves too seriously. Friends
have fun listening to each other’s silly rambling quirky thoughts, just because
they’re friends.
Think about it.
Are you and your spouse friends?
Whether or not you are, you are in luck. The Love Walk on May 20th is probably the best
antidote to a lonely marriage that you can put to use right away.
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